My friend Jason once told me about how growing up here they would make them do tornado drills and watch this movie called "Terrible Tuesday". Well, here I am on a TUESDAY listening to tornado watches interrupt my regular programming. After my experience in Illinois in 2003, I'm a bit freaked out of these little beasts. However, if one's going to hit, I'd prefer it hit here, take my trashed love seat and go. So until I am one of the growing number of Triad victims losing power, I blog.
Oh North Carolina. Sigh. As I approach my time to leave, I can't help but wonder if life would have worked here had I moved to a different place. Charlotte? Asheville? Wilmington? Chapel Hill? All places much more in line with Heatherness, or so I'd like to imagine. However, despite my distaste for my town, there are things I'm going to miss here.
MISUNDERSTANDINGS
Ever since I moved here, I have a tough time understanding the accent of some in this area. To be honest, most are pretty decipherable. However, there are some that are not. I can't tell you the number of times I've replied, "What?" when told or asked something. I have been confused by "calestrol" (cholesterol), "pocketbook" (purse), and "buggy" (shopping cart). I've been told I'm not from here because I speak too fast, and wanted to rip my hair out at the rare times I've been through a drive-thru.
One of the biggest issues has been phone calls. I can't tell you the number of times that I've answered the phone at work and announced people incorrectly. I announce the person to be met with silence. "Who?" will reply my boss. I say it again. "You mean ____?" he retorts. "Sure," I answer. It's been a debacle the entire year and a half here. So then yesterday took the cake. I asked who was calling for my boss, and the guy said his name and I couldn't understand him.
Me: Pardon?
Caller: Oh dear Lord.
I call my boss.
Me: Oh dear Lord is on the phone.
Boss: WHO???
Me: It sounded like 'Oh dear Lord'. Maybe Odell? Do you know an Odell?
Boss: (pause) Odell Miller?
Me: Sure. That's him.
My mother thinks this latest stint is fluid in my ears because I'm also experiencing vertigo in chairs with no arm rests. For now I'd like to attribute it to Westerneritis.
